Hoping to someday find M's brother adopted in the U.S. -
Myckola Oleksandrovych Markov - 8/26/2003

Thursday, September 5, 2013

In the meantime...

We're starting to get our packing lists together, and purchase things we will need.

I got the travel prescriptions.

I booked flights!

I found Puma tennis shoes on clearance at our local department store and bought a pair for V and little V.  D LOVES Puma stuff, but they didn't have his size.  I got him the exact same shoes for Christmas and I think these must have been leftovers.  I got them both for less than half of what I paid for his.  Gonna be some happy boys :)

We're trying to squeeze in IEP meetings for M before we go.

Oy.  Really... who enjoys these!?

I'm involving MY team this time. Her preschool teacher from last year and her tutor from the past two years both know what she is capable of.  M is a complex little girl sometimes, but she's had some wonderful people working with her this past year that know what she is capable of.  So, I'm getting my ducks in a row because I expect big things from my girl and I just don't settle for less.

Overall, she is loving school.  After 4 1/2 years of being left behind every time her grouppa went to music class or to play outside, she still takes such joy in being "allowed" to attend public school in a typical class room "with da rest of da kids."  No one ever wanted to even let her crawl on the floor at her orphanage and as a result she has extremely delayed motor planning skills and spatial awareness issues.  I'll be darned if anyone ever tells my kid where she can and can't go under her own steam EVER again.  Mariah takes on the playground equipment like a little boss simply because she can.  We had a great preschool staff the past two years that let her do everything the other kids did.  Yes, she came home covered in mulch from the playground sometimes because she was crawling around pushing a truck.  I didn't care.  :)

Attachment issues are always another fun topic to bring up at IEP meetings.  I really wish ALL school staff was able to take a course on this or were at least given literature to inform them that it does exist.  There are SO many kids in the school system that are at risk for attachment disorders.  Kids in foster care, kids who's daddy has walked out, kids who have been se.xually abused, and the list goes on and on.  Teachers and staff often have no idea as to why someone wouldn't want them to hug their child or tell them that they love them.  If I ever have spare time again, I really think I would like to address this issue with our local schools because a parent shouldn't have to fight to have staff agree keep physical affection to an appropriate level for their attachment at risk child.  Teachers are at a disadvantage as well if they don't understand how a child in their class functions differently.  I constantly worry that since they don't understand, they won't follow through and enforce the boundaries.  I felt better after this meeting than I have in the past though.  Maybe part of it is that I am able to explain it better.

I miss my boys terribly.  I know I'll miss my kids when I have to leave them here again.  They are already getting clingy and Wy even started to cry about it today.  My sweet babies.  Its so hard to leave.  Its just as hard to realize that there are millions of little ones without parents around the world right now.  Heartbreaking.  How long have my boys been without a mama to tuck them in at night?  I just want to get all of my babies under one roof again.  This being a mama from one side of the ocean or another is for the birds!



chicks3 said...

I am a retired teacher who never received any training/inservice on attachment issues. We were told not to hug children because the district feared sexual abuse charges. I was always a hugger for those who wanted a hug. You should talk to the school and maybe even the district teachers and help them to understand. Teachers love their students and want to do what is best for them.

Mama of 3 said...

Thanks for the comment, Chicks3. I realize this isn't something that most people are aware of and many teachers are hearing it for the first time from ME. M does have a letter from our social worker in her file detailing why we have made such requests. Its up to the staff to read it though. I really feel that a class taught by a social worker would be so beneficial to school staff! I would never want to tell a teacher not to hug ALL of her students just because my child needs different boundaries, but I do wish they understood that NOT hugging can be the most loving thing they can do for some kids.

We witness a miracle every time a child enters into life; but those who make their journey home across time and miles, growing within the hearts of those who wait to love them,are carried on the wings of destiny; and placed among us by God's very own hands. --Kristi Larson