Hoping to someday find M's brother adopted in the U.S. -
Myckola Oleksandrovych Markov - 8/26/2003

Thursday, November 21, 2013


I just wanted to take a moment to say that if you know an adoptive family, please take the time to send them an encouraging message, text, card, blog comment, or phone call.  They are fighting the spiritual battle for the life of a child (or children), often for months and months as they wade through the process, and they need to know you care.  ESPECIALLY if you are their pastor or small group leader, but also if you are their friend or neighbor.  What I've found is that adoptive families often choose to adopt because they understand brokenness.  What that also translates to is that understand not having anyone because they do not have anyone they can count on.  Often they do not have the support of a strong Christian role model.  Often they do not have the support of parents.  Often they do not have the support of their own family.  They might still be struggling to come to terms with loss and abandonment in their own life.  While this leads to a great empathy and understanding of what it feels like to be an orphan, it also means they need you.

So please, take a moment and let them know you care.  If you attend a church, let your pastor know they could use an encouraging word and lots of prayers.  Maybe they've had a bad experience with "the church" in the past and are afraid to ask this for themselves.  Set up meals for them when they come home.  Ask if their kids need anything.  Not everyone is called to adopt, but those who do need cheerleaders.

We are not "special" people or some sort of superheroes.  We are just normal people who couldn't let children grow up without parents, and often we've already experienced a lot of loss in our own lives that tends to leave us a bit jaded and skeptical of people.  I'm speaking both from personal experience and from a lot of conversations I've had with other adoptive moms.

WE NEED YOU.  We appreciate a kind word or gift sent more than you can ever know, even if we are too neck deep in paperwork or frazzled from jet lag to properly thank you.
WE APPRECIATE anything done to offer congratulations or help.  Anything.    

I'm really thankful that this time around, we have had some of our own cheerleaders.
It has been wonderful to know that people care.

1 comment:

Keri said...

Thank you for this post. I'm overseas adopting at this moment, and struggling to 'feel the love'. I wish people responded to adoption with the same fervor and joy as a birth. It is lonely sometimes. I'm a single mom adopting for the second time. What I wouldnt do for a few more cheerleaders <3

We witness a miracle every time a child enters into life; but those who make their journey home across time and miles, growing within the hearts of those who wait to love them,are carried on the wings of destiny; and placed among us by God's very own hands. --Kristi Larson